Lucy I hate to break it to you....

So one of my many jobs at Casa D'Lucy is to feed gran. Make sure she eats regular meals (read: dinner) and that she doesn't cook. Every time she tries to cook she forgets whatever is in the pot and burns the hell out of it (the other night it was sausage and she fried it in a saucepan and I had to boil the soapy water in the pan for a half an hour to even attempt to get it clean)

Welll....the other night I'm cookin dinner and I bring her a plate. It was a simple hamburger patty and baked beans with cole slaw and some cantaloupe. I brought her a fork and the plate to her dreaded red chair.

She looks at me and says "Nothing to drink?"

I retort "I only have so many hands. I will get you something to drink"

I bring back milk.

"I don't want milk."

Tough. Take the milk. I hand her the milk.

"I don't WANT milk"

I look at her calmly and tell her she needs the calcium for strong bones.

She takes the milk.

I turn around

"Bring me a spoon"

What?

"Bring me a spoon for my beans"

I bring her the spoon and she hands me the untouched milk.

"I don't want milk. Bring me something else."

What do you think this is, burger king?? Your way right away? Seriously?

I set the milk down and walk away.

KENNA

I keep walking.

KENNA I AM TALKING TO YOU.

yes I hear, but I'm ignoring her and continuing on

KENNA COME BACK HERE.

seriously? I looked at her and said

"THIS IS NOT BURGER KING. IT'S NOT YOUR WAY RIGHT AWAY. DRINK THE MILK, DON'T DRINK THE MILK.....MY JOB HERE IS DONE"

then I started laughing.

She's a piece of work I tell ya!!